Best Man Toast

Last weekend, August 20th, I was the best man at my sister’s wedding. Part of being her best man included standing beside her up front in the chancel of the church. Another part was giving the opening toast at the reception. 

The following is the toast I gave in front of over 100 people, friends and family, and friends and family of my sister’s wife:

Hello everyone. It’s great to be here with you all tonight.

Now for those of you who have not yet gotten to privilege of meeting me, my name is Max, and I am Zoe’s little brother.

Before I get going here, I just want to make clear that I have never given one of these before, I’m a terrible public speaker, and half way through writing this I had to remind myself that this was for a toast and not a roast. So please bear with me tonight.

When my sister asked me to do this for her back two Christmases ago, it really said a lot. One of the things it said was, “Hey, I have no friends.”

But really, I’m thrilled to be here tonight, so I can give a shout out to my favourite lesbian couple on earth….Ellen Degeneres and Portia de Rossi. You guys are amazing, Ellen I love your show!….Zoe and Kelsey, you guys are alright too.

Well what more can I say about my sister Zoe? I mean really, just look at her resume; a teaching assistant, to a YAV in northern Ireland, a development worker at McCormick, graduate assistant at IU and now the direct of external affairs of a non-profit in Texas. Wow. I mean really, is there anything you actually can do?

Zoe is a unique individual and is passionate about many things. Yet as anyone who has ever met Zoe will know, she can be a little high strong at times. She’s well intentioned, but sometimes she can have a bit of an edge. In fact one time, her attitude was so bad that it caused our mother to snap as she shouted out, “Zoe you have got to lose the edge! otherwise you will end up with no friends in life!” So again, I guess the fact that she had to come to me to be her best man…

When I was writing this I struggled and struggled about what I would say. There’s just so much material on this one. But I decided I would talk about Zoe as a sister. Zoe exemplifies all the great characteristics one would expect from an older sister; she’s selfless, honest, and exceptionally kind. So here are just a few examples of times when Zoe has demonstrated those qualities:

Once when I was little, Zoe, in a terrific display of selflessness, was so concerned about my safety that she chased after me, screaming all sorts of four letter words, and actually tried to push me off my bike so I would fall and get hurt…all in an attempt to teach me the importance of wearing a helmet, which I was not at the time. That Zoe, always looking out for my safety. Always Putting me over herself. Never mind the fact that I managed to pedal away right as she tried to push me, causing her to fall on the ground instead. Jokes on you.

One thing is for sure about Zoe, you can always count on her to tell you the truth, even when it’s not what you want to hear, but what you desperately need to hear. Like the time when she and I got into a huge fight, and in the heat of the moment she blurted out, “Max! Santa isn’t real! It’s mom and dad!” What a way to find out. Granted, at that point I was 12 and far too old to be believing in Santa anyway. So I guess she was just looking out for me again. Thanks Zo. I guess honesty really is the best policy. Never mind the spiraling depression that put me in and the tears that were shed upon that new revelation.

Another time, the day she got her driver’s license. Excited and full of energy she rushed into my room and said “Max let’s go get ice cream!” So we drove to Graeter’s and got a couple two cones, and on the way back, while leaving the parking lot, Zoe forgot to check her mirrors before backing up and all of the sudden we heard this thud and when we looked back, there was a middle aged man getting up off the ground and he did not look happy. Yes within 24 hours of having her driver’s license, Zoe managed to knock a person over in a parking lot. There’s no ‘good sister theme’ here, I’ve just always wanted to tell that story in front of everyone.

But in all seriousness, for the most part Zoe has always been a good sister, and a great friend. I’ll always cherish our memories together, like our annual screening of the Devil Wears Prada in December, or bean trips to Starbucks with our mom’s credit card. Or ordering pizza on a summer night in Saugatuck, also with our mom’s credit card. And I’ll especially cherish the night I took Zoe to the Saugatuck high school parking lot and taught her how to ride a bike. It’s the little things like that that really define a relationship between a brother and sister.

And while we may fight at times, like when she stormed out of the tv room fuming because I kicked her ass in Wii tennis, or when I threw a tantrum because I was convinced she cheated in our Christmas eve game of sorry, we’ll always be brother and sister at the end of the day. And in the words of The Fosters’ theme song, ‘that’s nothing I would trade, I wouldn’t have it any other way.’

Zoe I’m incredibly honoured to be your best man, and I couldn’t be happier for you. And Kelsey, welcome to our family. Ya know, I’ve been thinking for a while now, what I really need is another sister. I have enjoyed getting to know you over the past two years, and I am so glad that you and Zoe found each other. And I wish you both the best as you set sail on your next journey together.

And now, as someone who definitely doesn’t need another excuse to drink, please join me in toasting Zoe and Kelsey.

Supergirl Rebirth #1: Review

Yesterday marked the return of Supergirl in the DC universe. Kara Zor-El, cousin of Superman, has had a bit of a hard time since her character’s death in the Crisis on Infinite Earths. There have multiple Supergirls since and her character has been reintroduce into the DC continuity and made several appearances in storylines since 2004.

Admittedly I do not know much about Kara and have not read much of her extensive history. I’ve mainly only read things in which she makes cameos. The bulk of my familiarity with Supergirl comes from the CBS (now The CW) television series. My overall first impression of Supergirl #1 is overwhelmingly positive. Steve Orlando did a great job introducing Kara to new readers, but still making it interesting to returning readers well versed in her history. 

Anyone who has watched the show will feel right at home with this Supergirl. While it’s not a direct parallel to the show, which was a huge success in its own right, it has a large influence on the Rebirth.

From what I’ve read elsewhere, this was also a huge task for Orlando as he essentially had to tie up all the loose ends from the New 52 Supergirl, which though I did not read it I’ve heard it was a total disaster. So Orlando had a lot of cleaning up to do and that shows a bit. It’s a very fast paced story because of that and it is a bit hard to follow at first, especially as essentially a new reader. I read it twice yesterday and the second time definitely was much clearer than my initial read.

The issue begins with Kara, who seems to have lost her powers, being sent on a voyage to the sun. While in space, a kryptonian werewolf strikes on earth wreaking havoc on National City. Supergirl eventually regains her powers and takes on the werewolf, setting up the next issue.

The story, though it moves a bit too fast for my liking does a great job establishing Kara and her situation in National City. Unlike the tv show, Kara is not a 24 years old, but 16 and is placed under the care of the Danvers family, and attends high school. On the surface, Kara is an average teenager which will add a nice dynamic to the story.

This issue is essentially an introduction that sets the stage for the rest of the series. As such it should judged accordingly. It does its job of introducing the character of Supergirl, displaying her powers and abilities, and shows us her normal life as Kara Danvers. As a spark to ignite what should be a very promising series, Orlando succeeds. 8/10

–M

Justice League––A League of One: Review

Perhaps one of the best things I’ve read all summer was Christopher Moeller’s stand alone novel, Justice League: A League of One. If you’ve ever questioned Wonder Woman’s place in the Justice League, this will end all doubts. Diana has come a long way since becoming the secretary of the Justice Society of America in Action Comics no. 13 back in 1942. 

This action packed story takes a more fantasy/sci-fi rout rather than the traditional Justice League motif. This story begins in a flash back to 1348 where all of the dragons are defeated. All excepted one. In present day, Drakul Karfang, rises from his long sleep and seeks to ravish the land.

A troubled Diana who is questioning her identity, receives a disheartening prophecy from the fates. The prophecy states that the League will defeat the dragon, but at the expense of their own lives. Diana, determined to save her friends, knows she must betray them in order to keep them alive. Singlehandedly, Diana takes down her fellow members of the Justice League, enclosing them in escape pods, sending them away while she goes off to fight the dragon alone, sacrificing herself.

This highlights some of the best qualities about Wonder Woman. She is compassionate, selfless, and strong  both physically and mentally. This shows Wonder Woman in a new light that had been lacking in her lexicon in comparison to the other members of the trinity (Batman and Superman). Finally we see Diana given the treatment she deserves. Showing resilience and strength she manages to protect her friends and conquer the challenges before her. In 1942 Diana was given the lame title of ‘secretary’ of the JSA. flash forward 60 years and Diana emerges as one of the strongest members of the JLA.

Not only is this a great Justice League story, but is also a fantastic Wonder Woman story that any fan of Diana should read. The artwork is also spectacular as the characters are drawn with great detail. Some of the panels almost deserve their own museum. 

–M

First Therapy Session

Today I officially had my first therapy session. For months now I’ve felt overwhelmed, stressed, nervous, and depressed about life in general. I have recently decided that I most likely will not be attending graduate school upon leaving KU. While for the better part of two years that was my plan, I no longer have the career ambitions that I did when I was 19. I simply don’t want to be in school for another 8 years once I leave KU. I still hold the areas of biblical studies and ancient history to be of high interest to me and will continue reading in those fields and learning about those topics, but only as a hobby. If you read the reviews of many of the books I’ve bought on Amazon, most of those readers do that for a hobby as well. They are not professionally trained in biblical studies, but have been interested in it and have been reading material in the field for years (sometimes decades). That’s what I look to do.

As I began having second thoughts about grad school and pursuing academia I couldn’t make a strong argument for going to graduate school. My best argument was, “well what else would I do?” That’s not a reason to go. In fact that’s a terrible reason. So now I’m left with the frightening realization that I have absolutely no idea what I want to do in life. At the moment I feel lost and alone in this busy world that never sleeps. This is a huge moment of transition in life as I begin the last half of my college career, begin searching for a more meaningful employment beyond fast food or retail, and as I begin settling down in one location. 

What I’m hoping my therapist and I can work out is what it is I feel called to do with my life. To find out what it is i’m passionate about, and where I feel most at peace with myself. This is only one of the many things we talked about in my first session and will be dealing with going forward. But this is a huge revelation. For almost two years now I’ve been telling myself once I graduate KU I want to pursue a masters and PhD and to explore academia. Now, I have no idea and that’s what I hope to discover during the next two years here in Lawrence. There’s still a chance that this summer was just a slump and that all this stress and frustration will die out when the semester starts and I’m settled in my new place. Due to that possibility I haven’t completely ruled graduate school out, but it is no longer the first choice and I have to act as if I’ve ruled it out completely, even if I haven’t quite.

Again this is only one of the many things my therapist and I discussed today. In this area, what I hope to get out of these sessions is to figure out what makes me happy. Lately very few things have made me happy. Very little excites me. As I mentioned before, this summer I revived my love of comic books. Perhaps the only good thing to come out of the summer. And while I certainly enjoyed the trip I took with my dad last week to New York, and while I look forward to my sister’s wedding, and finally being all moved into my apartment, I still don’t know what I’m doing with life. I don’t know what this is, but I know that I don’t like it and I don’t want to be in this place. Hopefully my therapist and I can figure out what makes me happy and what it is that I find fulfillment in. Because the sad reality is, there’s no money in reading comics. Hopefully this will be the fresh start I’ve been looking for since I was thirteen. 

–M

Speaking at my Sister’s Wedding Reception

Last Christmas (2014) my older sister asked me to be her best-man at her wedding (this summer). Now at the time my parents were hosting a Christmas party and both of us had been drinking. Zoe, my sister, was definitely slurring her words a bit, and I had definitely had quite a bit of Jack Daniel’s that night. Nonetheless, intoxicated or not, I graciously accepted. 

Fast forward to this past Christmas (2015) and my sister informed me that she would like me to give a toast at her wedding reception. Again, this was a after a few glasses, but once again I graciously accepted. It’s custom for the best-man and maid of honour and others to speak at the reception and I was looking forward to it.

I immediately began pulling up all the Comedy Central Roasts online to get into the zone for writing my speech. I quickly began to jot down some themes and possible jokes I could make. I figured out what direction I wanted it to go in and this summer I started writing it. 

As of today, I have put the final touches on it and it’s ready to print. (I’ll post the final speech after the wedding). Admittedly it was a challenge to write as I had never had to write anything like it before. I’ve written papers on ancient near eastern prophecy and early Christian christology before, but never a wedding toast.

It took me a while to balance being crass and borderline mean as well as personal and sentimental seeing as she is my sister. After carefully studying the Comedy Central roasts to try and nail down the tone and delivery I wanted to give, I did a lot of careful reflection on some of my favourite memories between me and my sister.

I am very satisfied with the final product. I think it perfectly balances being blatantly mean, funny, and very sentimental in a way that only a little brother can do. There’s something in it for everyone who will be in attendance. Stuff her friends can relate to, stuff our parents will pick up on, and stuff our extended family, and family friends will get.

Though I’ve never been a great public speaker (actually i’m pretty terrible) and have never spoken in front of 100+ people before, I’m excited to do it. With just a  little over a week left until the wedding all that’s left now is practicing delivery. #LetsGo

–M

Wonder Woman-The Hiketeia: Review

Greg Rucka’s first run with Wonder Woman was a smashing success that will go down in Wonder Woman lore as one of the best of all time. He would later go on to become the writer for vol.2 no. 195–226. The Hiketeia, refers to an ancient ritual in which someone, a supplicant, places themselves under the unconditional protection of another. The protection must be absolute or all parties involved will suffer at the hands of the furies.

In this stand alone novel, a girl named Danielle Wellys comes to Diana and seeks Hiketeia from her. Diana accepts and becomes Danielle’s protector. Eventually however, it is revealed that Danielle came to Wonder Woman as a form of refuge from Batman who is trying to find her and bring her to justice for the murder of four people in Gotham city. Upon learning the news of Danielle’s situation she is faced with a decision, to honor the rules of Hiketeia and protect her supplicant, or to turn her over.

This acclaimed novel has been widely considered as one of the best installments in Wonder Woman’s lengthy lexicon. Rucka’s stand alone work gives the readers a great insight to who Diana is as a character, as well as shows off her great strength during her iconic beatdown of Batman.

Wonder Woman’s strength far exceeds or matches almost any opponent she could conceivably face. As a warrior, she was trained since birth in the Amazon ways of fighting and has been described by Batman himself as the best melee fighter in the world. Thus Batman’s decision to fight Diana is a terrible mistake on his part, as demonstrated by the image of Batman’s head on the ground with Wonder Woman’s boot firmly planted on it.

Rucka’s writing in this is phenomenal, making great use of mythology, and the artwork is stunning. This is a must read for Wonder Woman fans new and old. If you want to get into Wonder Woman and her amazing story, this is required reading.

–M

The Return of Comics

This summer I have found myself in a bit of slump academically. Several books that I purchased specifically to read this summer in hopes of expanding my knowledge and in preparation for graduate level work. Topics of these books ranged from the Q-Source of the synoptic gospels, the transition of Rome from Republic to Empire, and a broad study of the classical world from Homer to Hadrian.

With a little over a week until fall term begins, academically speaking I managed to get through about 2 books during the months of June, July, and half of may and now nearly half of August.

What happened? Basically this summer has been a very stressful and overwhelming summer for me and I simply felt uninspired. The things that used to interest me no longer did, and I found myself unable to get into the books that just a few months ago I would have plowed through.

So what did I put my time and energy into then, if not into my academic interest? Instead of books on the Roman empire, the gospel traditions, or ancient religions, I found solace this summer in an old and estranged friend. When I was a kid I loved reading comics. I thought Superman and Batman were the coolest things out there and the animated Justice League TV show was my favourite thing to watch. This summer, when everything else seemed to either stress me out to the point of insanity, or bored me to death, I found comfort in returning to my childhood roots and reading comics.

Thanks to a few websites, I was able to find archived issues of my favorite characters from D.C. and Marvel and read them online. Kindle also had some great offers that I took advantage of. One character this summer however, stood out above all the rest. A character who I once overlooked as a naive 8 year old boy only interested in BatMAN, SuperMAN, and Spider-MAN. Perhaps the biggest surprise was how much I loved Wonder Woman’s story. Sure, when I was a kid I loved Wonder Woman, but only in the sense that she was a member of the JLA and therefore I was a fan by extension. She had some pretty cool story arcs and I loved her comics but they were secondary to the Hulk, Superman, Captain America, etc. This summer however I really got to reintroduce myself to the Princess of Themyscira and instantly Wonder Woman became not just my favorite female superhero, but my favorite superhero in general.

After spending a few months pouring over her lexicon and history she is not even just my favorite superhero, but easily my favorite character in all of fiction. I should emphasize, it has absolutely nothing to do with her being a tall, slender woman who essentially wears only a bikini with red boots and a tiara. As a character, Diana’s beauty is all in her strength and her personality. She is an exceptionally beautiful woman though, which only makes sense seeing as she was blessed by the gods with the beauty of Aphrodite at her creation.

This all came to a climax when the trailer for next summer’s Wonder Woman movie was released at San Diego Comic Con. Though I had read George Perez’s iconic WW run (vol. 2 #1-24) before, as of today I officially ordered the Perez Omnibus.

Comics of not just Wonder Woman, but Superman, Batman, the JLA, and a host of Marvel characters as well has easily take place as my number one hobby.

Getting back to the beginning of this post. What does this mean about my future? As I have stated in months prior, graduate school is something I was very interested in and I wanted very much to pursue academia as a career. While it is certainly possible that this summer was simply a slump for me, made worse by stress and slight depression, I can no longer make a strong case for why I should go to graduate school. At this point my best argument is, I’ve already invested a lot of reading into the topic, and I don’t know what else I would do. Both terrible reasons to spend thousands of dollars on something that may turn out to be nothing more than an extensive hobby (ancient history, biblical studies). What does it say when what was suppose to be my life passion can easily be shelved in the event a new Wonder Woman novel comes out (like one will in late September when post-New 52 Resurrection is released).

In short, I’m thrilled to revive my love of comics and to have developed such a strong passion for another character. As of now, I really don’t see myself pursuing graduate school anymore. I’m frankly tired of school and spending two years for a masters, and another 6 of 7 for a PhD just doesn’t like something I want to do anymore. For now, I’ll continue with my major as planned, and look for jobs not necessarily rooted in academia upon graduating from Kansas. In the meantime I can relax and not stress out so much about school and can enjoin the new D.C. Rebirth series.

–M